Category: Today I Get Stronger

Thank you, Morning Chalk Up

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3 months ago, I was stepping GINGERLY into the shower with my husband and I looked him in the eye and said “I’m never going to PR my squat again and I’m okay with it.”

The last time I was able to max was Fall of 2017. And my joint health has just been such a problem. But I didn’t ever give up. And I never stopped working.

In 2016, I had my first trip to the knee surgeon. The surgeon gave me 5 diagnoses on my left knee and assumed the right knee was in a similar status because I have a congenital defect. To simplify it – I was born with my knee caps in the wrong place and dislocate very easily. The surgeon told me that there was little to nothing that he could do. To quote him as closely as possible, what he said was “one day you’re going to not be able to bear the pain anymore and you’re going to say “it’s time” (to get a total knee replacement). The reason that he said “one day” is that if I went for a TKR, it would be a long and slow rehab and it would probably remove me from competitive CrossFit and Olympic lifting.

I’ve done the work that the knee surgeon recommended – I tape my knees (McConnell taping technique), wear braces, ice, compress and done so much PT.

Fast forward. May. I can pinpoint it. It was the Thursday before we were to do Murph. I had just done a shitton of double unders. I mean. SO MANY. Because my assignment was to get 10 sets of 30 unbroken and to keep going until I could do that. So. I did. And it took me about 45 minutes and 23,000 attempts. I was moving onto Snatches and had set up on the OLY platform. Next to the platform was a stack of weights that butted up to the weight shelf. I put my water bottle there, but being clumsy, I dropped it. I walked around to the front of the shelf to retrieve it, but I couldn’t reach. So, I stooped down and leaned forward, reaching for the water bottle. My knee gave a loud pop. But that was it. I got my water bottle and went back to practicing snatches.

Middle of the night, I got up to go to the bathroom, and I could not bear ANY weight on my knee.

After a day, we went to urgent care. Got x-rays. Got sent home with a big metal hinge brace and prescription for 400mg Ibuprofen. Doctor’s appointment and then surgeon appointment and then MRI and another surgeon’s appointment resulted in one course of oral prednisone (and a weight gain of about 8 lbs which is BOOOO HISSS) and then a cortisone shot in my knee … because … I tore my medial meniscus this time. I started PT at Rokke Therapy and had to lay off squatting.

But then. Slowly, strength in my legs started to come back. Jake programmed SO MANY exercises besides the PT (which I still do EVERY MORNING) … following the PT’s recommendations of lots of single leg work. Lots of slow, steady movement. SO MANY BOX SQUATS. BORING WORK. But work that I was willing to do.

So when there was a front squat ladder at last weekend’s competition that went from 65 to 175#, I was aiming to HOPEFULLY make the 155 bar. That one went down and up easy … so I decided to hit the 165# bar. And figured why not try on the 175. It was money.

I’m always learning.

I now know that I just can’t ever say something is not going to happen.

And I also know that the world is watching, or at least Mama Danger is ❤️ and she writes for the Morning Chalkup and they celebrate all of the wins.

Being Authentic … and having a Growth Mindset … is a CHOICE

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authentic (1) of undisputed origin; genuine (2) based on facts, accurate, reliable (3) relating to or denoting an emotionally appropriate, significant, purposeful, and responsible mode of human life

Photo by Molly Bermea of Frizz Studios; Style by Megan Blake of MB Beauty; Outfit by The Chestee; Site CrossFit Code Red, Hillsboro OR

Last weekend, I was so fortunate to have been the subject of a photoshoot. I am a brand ambassador for The Chestee and it was time to get more than screenshots from video for promotion of my involvement with the brand. I’ve never had a photoshoot like this before. There was a makeup artist and hair stylist. There were multiple outfits to change and so many props. And honestly, good music thanks to my CrossFit coach and so many laughs, smiles and fun thanks to everyone involved.

The photographer Molly was amazing. She has some experience shooting CrossFit, a graphic arts background and has an amazing gift at capturing someone’s spirit and personality in a photo. And this gift is why she was chosen for this photoshoot. We wanted someone to capture ME. Not just another fit girl modeling a sports bra.

I will be 100% honest about what I first saw when I saw this picture vs what I see with my growth mindset focus.

I first saw the flap of skin hanging over the waistband of these pants and was immediately disappointed in myself for not tucking it in.

But then, I took a deep breath and reminded myself that the skin is there as a sign of human life and healing. That skin is just a physical representation of growth between when I was trying to find my way and today.

And in this moment of realization, I immediately felt so happy, proud and motivated to just keep plugging away.

The truth is … flap of skin or not … THIS PHOTOGRAPH IS AMAZING. It captures the ESSENCE of WHO I AM. I am HAPPY. I am STRONG. I LOVE the barbell. Living life to the fullest, laughing and spending time with my family and working towards my goals using small baby steps is the core of my identity.

I could have made the choice in that moment to remain critical of my body and not like this photo. Or I could have requested that my photographer photoshop that skin out.

But instead, I am so proud to be able to share this amazing picture. I have made the choice to be authentic, to love myself … and I am sharing it, proud and happy. This is who I am.

 #lovelife#happyhappy#workharder#traineverydamnday#maketimeforyou#eatcleantraindirty#realitycheck#growthmindset#crossfitgirls#momswithmuscles#fitness#transformationtuesday#thisis200lbs 📸 by @frizzstudio 💄 by @mbsbeautypage outfit by @thechestee (use CORINNE10 in your 🛒 to save some 💰) || #worldsokayestweightlifter#mastersathlete#snatch#barbell#babe#crossfit#weightloss#transformation#transformationjourney#ilostweight#crossfitmasters#sweat#fitspo

Fear can be powerful

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Fear IS a powerful emotion. But you can really use mindset focus and training to overcome it. I’m not JUST saying this. I’m PRACTICING IT.

I’m truly scared to do box jumps.

I have had 2 wrecks. One in my home gym on a tiny box – and one at a competition. Scars on my shin will forever remind me of the injury.

So when I’m supposed to try something NEW on the box. Is even MORE scary. So. These little 20” “no running start” and special landing position jumps (jake what are these called?) are a big deal.

These were part of barbell class last night – designed to help us land in the right position. So these 10 jumps were kinda a big deal. 

Video on facebook: https://www.facebook.com/corinne.stonier/videos/10157222784572774/ 

 

#faceyourfear #boxjumps #akashinsharks#domorebemore #beautyinstrength#transformationjourney #stronger#faster #leaner #momswithmuscles#mastersathlete #cfcrathlete

How I Got Started = Move Part 1

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If you’ve read my “Journey” page – you will see this is what I have written about how I got started with exercise. Please realize, this is only PART of how I got started, but I am going to write a blog post about each arm that lead to success  (Mindset, Menu, Move, My Tribe).

I made a commitment to start to move my body.  Exercise seemed so out of reach for me, because my previous successful experience with exercise had only been through a $500 a month gym/personal trainer combination. But I decided to try. My sister sent me the DVD’s to do the 21-day fix through Beachbody and Autumn motivated me every morning to just hold on for 30 minutes. Then, I started walking my dogs. Even when it was raining (BTWs – pugs in raincoats are SUPER cute).  Then Lizzy, who was then 13 years old, said she was going to take over as my personal trainer. We did our first race together. Then our second. And more. And my BFF Shae signed us up for our first Ashley Horner Transform You Challenge, and we started lifting weights in my garage. Which morphed into becoming a transformation challenge winner and an Ashley Horner ambassador, earning me 1,000s of Ashlete Sisters and friends from across the globe.

Move:

The very first step for me was in my living room with a dvd player and borrowed DVDs (which I have since lent out and they have come back and been lent out again multiple times).  The DVDs were from the 21 day fix program, filled with positive motivation, compound whole body exercises using small dumbbell weights with focus on getting through the workout one minute at a time.

I will be very honest about this part of the process. 

IMG_9037It was NOT pretty.

I struggled.

It HURT to get up and down off of the floor. 

I felt BAD about myself.

I got MAD that I had let myself go. I used to be an athlete.

And I beat myself up on an almost daily basis in the very beginning.

BUT – in order to start – all I had to do was wake up 30 minutes earlier than normal. My sister kept bugging me. It was only 30 minutes. I had excuses and she had answers.

I had to convince myself that I had time.

I already took a shower before work. I already had the morning rush. So … if all I had to do to workout was get up 30 minutes earlier, go down some stairs and push a power button, I had to keep reminding myself, I had no excuse.

No more excuses

They say it takes 21 days to build a habit.

So, I set off for 21 days being my goal. Day after day, I would get up, do the DVD and then get ready for work. I followed what my sister (an avid beachbody coach at the time) encouraged me to … so, I downloaded a few fun graphic apps for my iPhone, worked on motivational sayings and took photos. I used the graphic apps, shared on Instagram and Facebook. I logged my progress. I posted a zillion positive affirmations to my social media. I reminded myself over and over that I could do this. I did not give up.

Slowly, I stopped beating myself up, and I started being proud.

img_9029.pngFirst, I was proud when I could complete a set.

Then, I became more proud when I could use … then increase … the weight I was lifting.

Then even more proud when I saw comparison photos.

Supplementary to these 30 minute exercise DVDs was simply going outside for a walk.

I had two fat pugs and I decided for their health, and mine, we would walk.

At first, all my knees would handle would be around the block (maybe 400 meters?). But by this point … I wouldn’t let knee pain stop me (stubborn much?!?).

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Then, I slowly built to a half mile, then a mile, then three. I would walk NO MATTER WHAT after dinner at night. Rain (put on a rain coat and go – and we even got the pugs raincoats). Darkness (put on a headlamp and a taser in your pocket). Exhausted (it’s only a few minutes out of your day and you owe it to yourself to do this before bed). Busy (when are you not busy?). Mom duties (Really? There’s a track where they practice soccer.  You can walk round and round and round the soccer field the whole 90 minutes she’s at soccer listening to podcasts about science so that you’re ready for your next exam).

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The walks turned into jogs. Then my daughter Lizzy decided that it was her time to be in charge of my “training” and that we were going to do a race.  So, we signed up for a 10k. And we trained for it. And we finished it.

The next phase: thanks to one of my BFFs, I discovered Ashley Horner and started my home gym.

To be continued …

 

 

I needed a push … and a free trip to Wodapalooza was dangled, so I joined a different transformation challenge

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My “why”:

I am already a transformer and so proud of my journey. But I joined this challenge because I need the next push. The story from the beginning of my transformation is on my website, www.corinnecan.com. 

One thing that is really important to know is that at this moment, the why behind my transformation is not so much because my kids are watching. My why is more about my overall health and strength goals at CrossFit. #goalweightstrongAF

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Diagnosis = I was born with my knee cap shifted to the wrong place and should have had a lateral release surgery years ago; now have ground down the cartilage and need to keep my knee McConnell taped when I train and will knee a TKR at some point.  Also. Arthritis. Also. Torn meniscus.  

In the fall of 2016, I was having a lot of physical pain in my knee. I sought the help of my doctor, who sent me for an MRI and subsequently to a good sports-knee surgeon. They discovered that I was born with my knee-cap in the wrong spot, and unfortunately, while I was losing weight and complaining about pain, the nurse practitioner I went to simply told me I was heavy and pain was to be expected due to my obesity and sent me on my way to continue to lose weight vs. seeking a proper diagnosis/reason for the pain. In following her instructions, I ground down the cartilage beneath my knee cap. After PT and multiple visits, the knee surgeon and I decided on conservative treatment (he said I will need a total knee replacement by the time I’m 60) which includes doctor’s orders to lose weight.

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CrossFit Goals:
I was lucky enough to be at WZA in January of 2018, the whole time I was watching, I thought about what it would be like to be on the stage competing and I wanted to participate. The reason I want to participate is partially the festival atmosphere that can only be WZA. I met SO MANY people there who have inspired my journey:
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· Ashley Horner actually shouted my name out while I was walking past her in the grandstands
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· I got a selfie with Bill Grundler
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· Hugged the founder and owner of The Chestee and got featured on their IG story.
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· Checked in with Spencer from Xendurance and met the whole crew at Rebellia
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· Alyssa Christian gave me advice.

This drive to participate in this transformation challenge is also simply due to the competitor in me. I want to know if I can do it. Am I capable (I know not of some of the movements, but overall??)? Do I have the capacity, the strength and the endurance?

I paid attention to the athletes and talked to some of them about what it takes to get to WZA and to be competitive. One masters woman didn’t have rope climbs … and I watched so many people struggle with the swim.

I am _this close_ to getting a strict pull-up (I still have to kick at the very last part). I am working towards dips. And while I was able to get my first handstand pushups in the open, I have only been able to get one since them.

I want to crush this 10 week challenge. I am going to use it to jumpstart myself back towards weight loss and in order to be STRONGER. I know that I have it in me.

Nutritionally, I can dial it in.

Physically, we are in strength cycle at CrossFit and I am currently learning how to swim so that I can be successful if I qualify for WZA2019.

I need to do better at running because I did just qualify for the CanWest games at the end of July and that competition begins with a 4.5 mile run and this challenge will drive me to put in the hard work necessary to be successful.

I have the support of my husband, daughters and friends and have stated, if I win, it will be very similar to the Ashley Horner Challenge, when I was able to purchase a rower and a Rogue Rack with the winnings, I want to purchase either an Air Runner or a Ski Erg ☺.

I am looking forward to the competition of the others in the challenge, to making new friends and to learning from RP and the other sponsors.

All the Best,
Corinne Cook – IG: pdxdressagemom